Have you ever thought of the possibility of not signing on means you are signing off of the relationship?

What role do you play when your partner makes a decision to heal?

The partner not taking part in the healing has been put into a role.

The role can be a supporter, an encourager, an ally or an opponent (just to name a few.) The partner who enters into healing will benefit from a support system that understands they are going through a process.

Back to the relationship itself, does the partner not in treatment have to understand what healing is taking place?

Must they be curious about their partner’s work? Does it matter?

Or can they sign off and continue to stay in the original rhythm of the relationship and not be aware of what is occurring?

If your partner doesn’t understand the importance of your healing (and their own) and watches you as a bystander, the relationship will suffer.

The relationship dynamics can start to feel like you are alone. This creates a “me”- mind frame and can feel like your partner is against you. Therefore, you are indirectly signing off of the relationship and the constant adjustments and attention needed to continue to grow as a couple.

There have been situations where one of the partners goes into treatment to appease their partner. Which in turn is not always beneficial because the priority becomes the partner versus their own healing process. When you or your partner are in treatment think about how the healing process is influencing the relationship as a unit.

Bottom line:

Think about how the healing process is influencing the relationship as a unit, whether you are in treatment, your partner is in treatment or you both are on your healing journeys.